Some days, especially on the most challenging days, I start to feel like my role as a leader and manager is very similar to the role I play as a parent. I entered management and fatherhood around the same time. Maybe that’s why I feel this way. Or perhaps it’s common for everyone. I’m not sure.
About a month ago, I was complaining to Mrs. Boring about trying to lead some senior members of the team. I frequently claim I would rather have an eager and optimistic average mid-level team member than a stubborn and uncooperative genius senior-level team member. This time, she drew a connection that sparked something. I had said that senior-level people are hard because they know enough to get things done but not enough to know the best path forward. They frequently don't take into account all angles, including business, politics, technology, culture, etc. Their original preferred path forward frequently doesn't work. Her response was describing a senior-level member of the team as a teenager. They think they know everything, have a hard time taking constructive feedback, and love to debate everything with the assumption that you aren’t informed enough to be in the know.
Amazing. I loved the metaphor. Since Mrs. Boring first mentioned it, I’ve been mentally expanding the metaphor. I finally decided I should put this down on paper. This metaphor isn’t meant to belittle employees or the relationships between leaders and their contributors. Instead, I’ve found that it’s beneficial to relate my team members to something I can understand easily to better lead them. It also helps to classify each team member, since titles seldom match contribution levels and frequently lag. Knowing what I'm working with turns me into a better leader.
Here is the metaphor.
The Kid-Team Member Metaphor
This metaphor involves having a clean room. With a clean room, you can have a clear mind and be more satisfied with your surrounds and more free to put your attention to more significant activities.
Junior Team Member
These team members are like a 5-year-old. I’m able to tell them to keep their room clean. They don’t understand. So I explain why it’s important to keep it clean and how a clean room should look. Everything goes over their head. The best option is to go into the room with them and help them keep it clean. I can tell them what pile to pick up and where to put it. They are helpful. It might take me an hour by myself to clean it, but with their help, we can get it done in 30 minutes.
This relationship is useful if I need to be in the room anyway. If we’re both working in there making a mess together, then having the help to clean up is very appreciated. Plus while I’m there working, I can also provide enrichment activities to help them grow faster.
In the end, they are beneficial, as long as I already intend to be in the room. If I’m not, then the place will naturally get messier with no one cleaning it up. They need a grownup in the room with them, or else they are more of a detriment.
Mid-Level Team Member
This person more relates to a 10-year-old. At this point, I can tell them that it’s important to clean their room. I can start them off with a clean place. I can then leave them alone and trust that for the most part, they’ll keep it clean. If I want to change their direction, I probably need to go back and help them pivot. But once they have their new direction, they can get it done.
The work this team member does is solid. It’s usually very close to what they were asked to do. Occasionally they surprise you with something exceptional. Most of the time, you’re just happy that they finished what you asked them to do. Frequent checkups are needed, but it’s just for touch-ups, not disaster control.
Senior Team Member
There are two types of people in this group, but both relate to teenagers.
Senior Team Members that share my values: These are the people who I either coached, mentored, or came from a similar environment. These are the holy grail individuals. They already have a clean room. That means I can go in and not spend time on basics like how to keep the place clean. Instead, since I have access to dozens of other rooms, I can work with them to figure out how to make their rooms even better. We can start digging into exciting things like upgrades, decorating, or room expansions. We can figure out ways to optimize and share that knowledge with others. And when I leave the room, I can trust that they’ll keep the place in order and keep being productive. They help make me better as I help make them better.
Senior Team Members that do not share my values: These individuals cut their teeth somewhere else. They frequently don’t understand why a clean room is essential. Their last environment didn’t care about that as long as they produced, which is fine if they are productive. But if they aren’t, then I need access to the room to see what’s going on. But I can’t, because the door won’t even open due to the mess. I can sit there and debate night and day about the basics of a clean room, but they disagree. They think they are killing it, regardless of the reality. They think they know best and want to be left alone. Unfortunately, they have a minimal set of experience and visibility, and so although they might be doing okay, in comparison to other rooms, they could be underachieving or worse. These individuals can still be productive, but they take a lot more work in first changing their values before getting real productivity out of them.
Managers, Leads, & Architects
To expand the metaphor higher, these individuals are the parents. They can see all of their kids’ rooms. They have more experience and can help guide others. Even if they don’t have more years of experience, they get to watch multiple rooms at once so get to see an accelerated rate of experience. The good ones can go into a room and point out how each team member can do things better, depending on the individual’s level.
Directors
And at the top of this metaphor would be the directors. These are the landlords. They can see multiple houses which let them see large scale trends. They might no longer care if a particular room is producing as long as it’s not taking the entire household down. But they care if the whole unit is being productive and can give insights to the parents if adjustments are needed. And they can provide upgrades to the entire house to increase everyone’s quality of life.
(Written 2019.03.22)
About a month ago, I was complaining to Mrs. Boring about trying to lead some senior members of the team. I frequently claim I would rather have an eager and optimistic average mid-level team member than a stubborn and uncooperative genius senior-level team member. This time, she drew a connection that sparked something. I had said that senior-level people are hard because they know enough to get things done but not enough to know the best path forward. They frequently don't take into account all angles, including business, politics, technology, culture, etc. Their original preferred path forward frequently doesn't work. Her response was describing a senior-level member of the team as a teenager. They think they know everything, have a hard time taking constructive feedback, and love to debate everything with the assumption that you aren’t informed enough to be in the know.
Amazing. I loved the metaphor. Since Mrs. Boring first mentioned it, I’ve been mentally expanding the metaphor. I finally decided I should put this down on paper. This metaphor isn’t meant to belittle employees or the relationships between leaders and their contributors. Instead, I’ve found that it’s beneficial to relate my team members to something I can understand easily to better lead them. It also helps to classify each team member, since titles seldom match contribution levels and frequently lag. Knowing what I'm working with turns me into a better leader.
Here is the metaphor.
The Kid-Team Member Metaphor
This metaphor involves having a clean room. With a clean room, you can have a clear mind and be more satisfied with your surrounds and more free to put your attention to more significant activities.
Junior Team Member
These team members are like a 5-year-old. I’m able to tell them to keep their room clean. They don’t understand. So I explain why it’s important to keep it clean and how a clean room should look. Everything goes over their head. The best option is to go into the room with them and help them keep it clean. I can tell them what pile to pick up and where to put it. They are helpful. It might take me an hour by myself to clean it, but with their help, we can get it done in 30 minutes.
This relationship is useful if I need to be in the room anyway. If we’re both working in there making a mess together, then having the help to clean up is very appreciated. Plus while I’m there working, I can also provide enrichment activities to help them grow faster.
In the end, they are beneficial, as long as I already intend to be in the room. If I’m not, then the place will naturally get messier with no one cleaning it up. They need a grownup in the room with them, or else they are more of a detriment.
Mid-Level Team Member
This person more relates to a 10-year-old. At this point, I can tell them that it’s important to clean their room. I can start them off with a clean place. I can then leave them alone and trust that for the most part, they’ll keep it clean. If I want to change their direction, I probably need to go back and help them pivot. But once they have their new direction, they can get it done.
The work this team member does is solid. It’s usually very close to what they were asked to do. Occasionally they surprise you with something exceptional. Most of the time, you’re just happy that they finished what you asked them to do. Frequent checkups are needed, but it’s just for touch-ups, not disaster control.
Senior Team Member
There are two types of people in this group, but both relate to teenagers.
Senior Team Members that share my values: These are the people who I either coached, mentored, or came from a similar environment. These are the holy grail individuals. They already have a clean room. That means I can go in and not spend time on basics like how to keep the place clean. Instead, since I have access to dozens of other rooms, I can work with them to figure out how to make their rooms even better. We can start digging into exciting things like upgrades, decorating, or room expansions. We can figure out ways to optimize and share that knowledge with others. And when I leave the room, I can trust that they’ll keep the place in order and keep being productive. They help make me better as I help make them better.
Senior Team Members that do not share my values: These individuals cut their teeth somewhere else. They frequently don’t understand why a clean room is essential. Their last environment didn’t care about that as long as they produced, which is fine if they are productive. But if they aren’t, then I need access to the room to see what’s going on. But I can’t, because the door won’t even open due to the mess. I can sit there and debate night and day about the basics of a clean room, but they disagree. They think they are killing it, regardless of the reality. They think they know best and want to be left alone. Unfortunately, they have a minimal set of experience and visibility, and so although they might be doing okay, in comparison to other rooms, they could be underachieving or worse. These individuals can still be productive, but they take a lot more work in first changing their values before getting real productivity out of them.
Managers, Leads, & Architects
To expand the metaphor higher, these individuals are the parents. They can see all of their kids’ rooms. They have more experience and can help guide others. Even if they don’t have more years of experience, they get to watch multiple rooms at once so get to see an accelerated rate of experience. The good ones can go into a room and point out how each team member can do things better, depending on the individual’s level.
Directors
And at the top of this metaphor would be the directors. These are the landlords. They can see multiple houses which let them see large scale trends. They might no longer care if a particular room is producing as long as it’s not taking the entire household down. But they care if the whole unit is being productive and can give insights to the parents if adjustments are needed. And they can provide upgrades to the entire house to increase everyone’s quality of life.
(Written 2019.03.22)
